chaotic mess and artistic funk

     I came across this and paused, then I looked a little harder.  I'm guessing this chaotic mess reflects my emotional state of late.  Anger, frustration, artistic funk, lack of motivation.  'Course, part of this is due to work starting to crank up the overtime again but I won't bore you with the details.  I would, however, like to apologize for not making my normal blogging rounds lately.

     Although I'm identifying more with this in the present I think this was actually completed back in October or thereabouts.  This shares a sandwich background with emergence and is the flip side of paleBleak just to give you a bit of creation trivia.  Well, it's getting late and I need to get my butt to bed.  Thanks for stopping by, you guys are the best.

feathery anger

     This guy really stopped me today when I was trying to figure out what I was going to post next.  His eyes ended up being pretty dramatic.  That combined with the overall fuzzy/feathery look seemed like a bit of a departure from what I normally end up creating with a black marker.  In fact, this almost crossed the line from fuzzy to feathery skeletonian.  I think that was mainly due to the fact I was using my india ink brush pens.  They have much less friction with the paper than a Sharpie and I end up with softer lines.

     In other news, I found myself getting into a shouting match with a co-worker last week.  I won't bore you with the details but I guess I should have seen something like this coming.  The source material for my new header image was created before the incident and should've served as a warning to me to watch my temper but I figured it was all a part of my artistic expression of late and I thought nothing of it.  What a way to start the year : P  Oh well, live and learn I guess.

blood bursting crazy

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     I've been feeling stressed lately.  Stressed and a little crazy.  October was an amazing month.  Not only did I have three day weekends all month, not only did I complete my Octoberween-Palooza-Ganza without a hitch but I also got inspired to paint a buncha shit.  I got spoiled during October.  Got a taste of what it's like to have plenty of free time and energy for my artistic pursuits.  Furthermore, my brain has switched over.  I'm an artist now, not a fucking factory worker.  I'm getting really pissed off at having to work, having to put up with all those assholes.  The only thing that keeps me on a fairly even keel is the fact that suffering makes for good artistic content.  Okay, okay, enough venting.

     Not sure what this was supposed to be.  A flexing arm with a bulging bicep or some disembodied genitalia.  Either way, it's bursting and releasing pressure, which is nice to see.  The crazy has got to get out one way or another.

thick wet lines

     It's hard to describe how I feel.  I just finished the thick, wet lines of this piece.  Something about this painting has put me in an intense, mostly unidentifiable mood.  This is a skull so I'm guessing fear is in there.  Probably some of the standard fear of the future associated with skulls and skeletons but that's definitely not all.  There's something angry and brooding about this as well.  Something that drains me and outrages me at the thought of it stealing my energy.  Still, I'm fascinated by it.  I can't stop thinking about it.  How it makes me feel.  I find myself frowning, like my whole skull and brain area is tensing up.  My head feels warm.  No, my brain feels warm.  I feel like I need to cry but I'm not sure why.  I feel violent.  I'm sick and tired of work.  I'm bored at work.  I only have one or two days a week during a normal week when I have the time and feel rested enough to pursue my artwork.  Not sure where I'm going with this.

     Last night the wife and I enjoyed a bunch of sushi and wine.  Afterwards we had desert, mixed drinks and enjoyed a very good vampire movie.  Today we went out to eat, got caught in a downpour, drove to get ice cream and soda in said downpour and came home.  After a brief scare of our air conditioner temporarily not working due to the storm, I made myself a jumbo margarita and completed another fuzzy skeletonian for October.  When we got hungry again, we nommed the hell out of a pre-made rotisserie chicken.  After dinner and coffee I came back here to my room and completed this painting.  Now I'm sitting here, listening to the Blade Runner soundtrack trying to sort out my feelings.  Maybe I'm wrestling with some sort of moody, artistic conundrum or maybe I'm just a tad hung over and disappointed that the weekend is winding to a close.  I think the painting is dry now.  Better get it scanned and start getting ready for bed.  Have a good week.

anger

     Another entry from my Sharpie craze.  A lot of anger in this one I think.  That's all I'm certain of, really.  This one doesn't trigger any specific memories for me.  Oh well, I can't ramble on about everything all the time.  Thanks for taking a look.