is it dry yet and an apology

     First of all, I would like to thank everyone for the kind comments, emails and all-around supportive advice.  You guys rule : )  Second, I'd like to offer a bit of an apology for freaking out a little.  It was late, I was trying to relax a bit and post some freakin' art and then I get the "oh noes, boobies and penises are bad!" thing from Picasa and it just pissed me off.

     Aaaanyway, here's what I was trying to post the other night (didn't have to accept the terms of "service" this time for some reason)::
     As you can tell, I was working rather wet and laying the paint on thick and messy.  I thought to myself when I was done that this would take a while to dry so I let it sit for days but its wet appearance never really went away:   ...and I'm still thinking, "Is it dry yet?" and that there's moisture trapped under there.  Like if I just carefully used an xacto knife or a razor blade wet paint would start running out!  I guess this is just the nature of acrylic when you really glob it on.

     Thanks again for all the suggestions and advice.  I'll be looking into all the possibilities.  Who knows?  Maybe I'll find a much better place to call home than Blogger.

blood flood and a commission

(ADULT CONTENT BELOW)       This is the flip side of this guy and you might even say it could be the remains of one of his victims.  Not sure, really.  I just know there's a lot of violence to be had in my artwork.  To be honest, my first thought about this bloody mess was that it was the remains of somebody who'd been eaten by some great beast or monster and this is what it spat out when it was done.  You can't eat the bones but they sure do add flavor, don't they?

     In other news, I've received a request for a commission and I've decided to go through with it to see how it feels.  Wish me luck!

new banner

     I've been meaning to do this for a while but I've been busy with getting distracted lately (you know how that goes).  Anyhow, Jesse over at ZOMBIE BITES modified one of my OPG banners from this past October by adding a pretty cool glowing effect to it and I thought I'd share in case you were in the market for a new banner:


     Thanks Jesse!

relaxing, giving up and geysers of blood

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     I've been concentrating on relaxing lately.  Getting back to my old habits of tuning out, wasting time and just resting.  Before this blog, before getting back into my art.  Just a nihilistic defeatism without hope, without dreams, without pain (or as close as I could get to it).  I would often play the game of thinking about being homeless.  Wondering what it would be like to not have a job, not have bills to pay, not have any "social responsibilities" or whatever you call them.  Just existing as a non-entity, a virtual zombie as it were.

     As a teenager, during my first of two senior years in high school I would often skip school to go down to the local creek and lay out on this big flat rock in the middle of the stream and just close my eyes and listen to the water flowing around me.  I miss that rock, that sound, that simplicity.  The freedom to just let everything fall apart.  Nowadays, I still hear water but I'm in a row boat with a slow leak.  If I stop rowing, if I stop bailing things get out of hand pretty quickly.  I still have the impulse to just chuck it all though.

     Perhaps that's what this abstract monster of blood geysers is all about.  Just a little wish fulfillment or a graphic imagining of the violence and destruction that would result in my life if I just gave the fuck up.

bloody teeth and Neil Diamond

     Been wanting to post this guy ever since I finished him but I can get REALLY distracted and lazy sometimes.  Anyway, here he is for your viewing pleasure.  As I recall, this was one from a batch of red eye pieces I cranked out while still buzzed from wine with dinner and jamming out to some old Neil Diamond (the really good shit:  Hot August Night, BBC Top of the Pops and Gold).  Man, what a crazy epic night that was.  I was so full of energy and just plain fearless!  Paint was flyin' and guys like this were appearing before me.  Sigh.  I miss those days...

     Feh, I guess you can't always be inspired and happy in your work.  Gotta have some malaise to make you appreciate the good times I guess.

chaotic mess and artistic funk

     I came across this and paused, then I looked a little harder.  I'm guessing this chaotic mess reflects my emotional state of late.  Anger, frustration, artistic funk, lack of motivation.  'Course, part of this is due to work starting to crank up the overtime again but I won't bore you with the details.  I would, however, like to apologize for not making my normal blogging rounds lately.

     Although I'm identifying more with this in the present I think this was actually completed back in October or thereabouts.  This shares a sandwich background with emergence and is the flip side of paleBleak just to give you a bit of creation trivia.  Well, it's getting late and I need to get my butt to bed.  Thanks for stopping by, you guys are the best.

a bird in my hair is worth two in your bush

     This was painted on the reverse side of this.  If I keep this up I'll have to make a bunch of double sided rotating frames to display a lot of my original works.

     Meh.  Still fighting with this laziness so I'll stop here.  Thanks for taking a look.

branch face and laziness

     Painted during the same session as this guy, I was originally going to post this back in October but I ended up with so many other works that month that this one got passed over again and again.  Anyway, better late than never.  Plus I am SO FUCKING LAZY today and this was already scanned and ready to go.  Enjoy and thanks for stopping by.

accidental red face

     Sometimes you just have to leave well enough alone and that's exactly what I did with this one.  This was one of my random wet sandwich backgrounds I made in a batch with a few others.  With most of my backgrounds there's some sort of suggestion of a face but this one had the face fully formed already so I decided to not touch it at all.  I love happy accidents like this!

a time to ponder

(you cleeka nao)
     After a full day of murder by dismemberment even the strongest of Fuzzy Skeletonians needs a few minutes to lounge and relax and reflect fondly on the bloody gurgling screams of his victims.  After all, if you don't take time to ponder and explore what you do then how can you hope to improve?  

puke face

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     This started with a basic monochrome print from an image of my own face.  I then proceeded with the marker and paints and ended up with something I wasn't satisfied with at all.  I then swallowed a bunch of grey paint, gagged myself and threw up all over it.  Well, that's what I felt like doing anyway.  Not sure if the final application of grey slurry enhanced this or just underscored my strong dislike of working from a prefabricated image base.

insane brother twins

     Thought I'd have myself a Monday-Palooza-Ganza and post two images at once!  Aw yeah!  This crazy train is flyin' right off the fuckin' rails, man!!  I'm outta control!!!

     Seriously though, this is vaguely special in the regard that you wouldn't normally see these two images side by side, as they are each painted on the opposite side of the same piece of watercolor paper.  However, through the magic of technology, here they are; a couple of dirty, bloody, twisted brother skulls in a kind of metaphysical emotional turmoil and insanity.  They share the same plane of existence, the same space, no doubt some of the same pigments, yet they've never seen each other face to face.  A pair of conjoined twins who are strangers to each other.

allies amidst the bleakness

     The background on this one turned out much more pale and bleak than most of my other Red Eye paintings.  Bleakness seems to be in the air lately.  It's almost as if everyone unconsciously believes the world will end this year.  I hope it does.  Humanity could use a big death and rebirth right about now.  A casting away of old habits, a blowing off of steam and a time to relax and get reacquainted with our true selves.  Just one big time-out to rest and reflect.

     Anyway, musings on humanity aside, the more I look at this painting the more I think it's a self-portrait.  I identify and sympathize with this guy's general state of emotion.  I can't put my finger on it exactly, but I'm right there with him.  I'm his comrade and ally.

stalactite rain

(ADULT CONTENT BELOW)


     Here's another shadow of the previously mentioned cave skellie idea.  This image also spawned a further development in the story:

     He's spotted me and now his confusion seems lessened by having someone to focus on.  His erection wanes a little and now starts to drip blood as he advances directly towards me.  I continue to retreat, weaving in and out of the stalactites, stalagmites and columns, attempting to outmaneuver him.  His arms are outstretched wide as he continues pursuit, there's no way around.  Behind him I can see daylight diminishing as he forces me deeper and deeper into the cave.

     I'm even more curious now to see where this will all lead.  I'll keep you posted as best I can.

faces in the background

     This is one of the reasons I love creating random backgrounds first.  Sometimes the faces just appear out of nowhere.  All I did was follow the red spots with the black and it all came into focus.  Fun stuff : )

sharing the fear

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(klik)
     Here's something I've been meaning to show you all for a while and one of the reasons I am so into painting right now.  Just look at that dark, murky blackness!  The first time I laid down some thick wet lines like this it really got to me but now it's something that I've grown to love.  There's just something so mesmerizing about the light reflecting off the wet paint and the fact that all it would take would be just one false move, one sneeze, one over-excited cat jumping up on my table and all of this beautiful liquid fragility would be completely ruined.  Of course, all of this gets lost once it dries and that's why I finally decided to take a quick snap shot for the sharing and stuff...

     No, I'm not just stalling because I'm afraid of starting on the head and potentially fucking this whole thing up, so don't even go there!  I'm sharing with you the beauty of creation and you should be grateful for this glimpse into my process...  You know what?  I don't CARE what you think!  I"M SHARING DAMMIT!!1!

blood bursting crazy

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(clicka)
     I've been feeling stressed lately.  Stressed and a little crazy.  October was an amazing month.  Not only did I have three day weekends all month, not only did I complete my Octoberween-Palooza-Ganza without a hitch but I also got inspired to paint a buncha shit.  I got spoiled during October.  Got a taste of what it's like to have plenty of free time and energy for my artistic pursuits.  Furthermore, my brain has switched over.  I'm an artist now, not a fucking factory worker.  I'm getting really pissed off at having to work, having to put up with all those assholes.  The only thing that keeps me on a fairly even keel is the fact that suffering makes for good artistic content.  Okay, okay, enough venting.

     Not sure what this was supposed to be.  A flexing arm with a bulging bicep or some disembodied genitalia.  Either way, it's bursting and releasing pressure, which is nice to see.  The crazy has got to get out one way or another.

retreating into the darkness

(ADULT CONTENT BELOW)

     This is just a shadow of the vivid image I can imagine of what will hopefully become a full-fledged fuzzy skeletonian.  I can see him in my mind, a fascinating waking nightmare:

     I'm backed into a cave and he's shambling towards me, a wild look in his eyes, blood spraying and dripping from his mouth as he shakes his head in a frenzy of uncontrollable rage, lust and a kind of disoriented confusion.  He's fully erect and ejaculating freely as he approaches.  The fuzzy, furry connective tissue between his bones is matted and filthy with an obscene offal of blood, semen, grease and who knows what else.  It's day time and behind him I can see golden sunlight pouring into the mouth of the cave but I'm retreating into the darkness behind me, trying to be inconspicuous, banking on his confusion to give me an opportunity to slip by undetected and make my escape.

     That's as far as this scene has progressed in my mind.  I hope to be able to post updates about this developing morbid fantasy as it hopefully continues to evolve into what I hope will be an extremely vivid horrific painting.

red eye and the tao of painting

     This one is a personal favorite.  It is one of the first Red Eye pieces I completed last month (although his red eyes are a tad muted in color compared to most).  The little bird-like thing up on the branch was a total accident.  I guess it's more accurate to say that it wasn't consciously planned.  I often find (despite my deliberate lack of planning) I already know what I'm going to create even before I know it, if that makes any sense.  I mean, seriously, his eyes even seem to look upward, curiously, at the bird but I certainly don't recall any clear thoughts about making that happen while I was painting.  I guess it's true what they say, "I do not do it.  It is not done.  It merely happens through me."

wood burn

     Been wanting to post this one for a while.  Kinda has a wood burn look to it.  Also...

     FUZZY GIVEAWAY 2011 UPDATE!  In case all ya'lls were wonderin', I mailed off yo' artworks Tuesday afternoon so they should be arriving any day now : D